Wanted: Friends

Nothing like my first two followers to give this blog a heartbeat.  Thanks, gals!

My So What! Wednesday post woes of not having any friends in my new city lit a fire under my arse.  I have been here for two months and aside from a girl I stalked in Target who is now my FB friend and the rotation of Starbucks' baristas,  I don't know a damn soul. 

When I first moved here, I stumbled upon and liked a FB page that is basically a playground tour of the Columbus Area (Is it bad that I am still misspelling Columbus, and always want to spell it Colombus or Colombia on my iPhone)...Every Thursday they post a park for you to go to and meet up with other moms.  Again, inspired by my prior post, I threw caution to the wind, left dishes in the sink, said eff you to the errands I was gonna run, grabbed my child and hopped in the car.  It was 10:45 on a beautiful day, meet up was at 11, GPS clocked the park to be a 12 minute drive.  Perfect. 

I arrived in 12 minutes just as my faithful GPS said I would.  However, I was not at a park.  I was at the dead end of a cul-de-sac in a cookie-cutter-all-the-houses-look-exactly-the-freaking-same neighborhood. FUCK.  I hate being late.  Especially when I'm walking into an unfamiliar place without a plan.  My initial reaction was to go home, but I decided to input the name of the park on my iPhone map and try to find it.  By the time I got to THAT location my child was crying in the back b/c in my carefree moment of LET'S DO THIS, I neglected to feed her.  Awesome. Except, when I arrived, this clearly was NOT the park.  Yea, it was a park but not the one where all those unsuspecting moms were waiting for me to arrive so we could become friends  DUH.

So I parked, fed her, and then used my best map reading skills- which is not saying much- to find THE park.  And I did.  Finally.  At Noon. I probably would have driven around all damn afternoon to find it.  "I know you're out there stupid park!"  Yeah, I was actually saying that out loud.  I'm clearly a five year old.

I wish this story had some awesome ending where I met this really great girl with a baby just a few days older than my bug, but truth be told, I left feeling a little defeated.  A little like Mommy Wars may really exist.  And a lot like I did in high school when it was the week my friends decided to hate me.  That happens to everyone, right?

I struck up a conversation with a mom who was pushing her kids on the swings.  I guess I was hoping when I said I was new in town and had no family or friends here that would be her cue to invite me into her world.  Yeah, no.  Instead, she and her other Mom besties in their cute little gym outfits  started chatting it up about this teacher and that swim class, and so-and-so's birthday party. I just kept on pushing Elena, all giggles and smiles, which should have been enough.  But in that moment, it wasn't.  I wanted that camaraderie and familiarity.  That promise of "see you later" or "I'll call you."   They rounded up their kids and headed out together, never glancing my way again.  Not gonna lie, I felt hurt.  How ridiculous is that.  I'm a little ashamed to admit it and A LOT glad that my daughter is too young to sense it. 

Paul says I have to manage my expectations.  He's right.  Like usual.  He also reminded me gently that friendships take time and not to give up.  So I decided to go on one of those social meetup website deals and hunt for some mom groups in my area.  I picked one and sent a request and got a reply back in a few short hours...One of the co-founders gave me two play date times for next week to attend before I can become a member.  They like to meet in a public place before giving access to their group.  For shiz? I feel like I'm pledging all over again.  Yeah, that's right, I paid for my friends in college.  I'm not gonna lie, I got a little nervous.  I am somewhat socially phobic.  So yeah, this whole making friends thing is conquering fears, too.  I haven't replied back but I'm gonna go.  Really.