Oh hey. You must be the terrible twos.

My child sleeps.  Soundly and like the dead.  And since daylight savings time,  we've had wake-ups at 9:45, and 10:45.  I thought I had a toddler, not a teenager.

Speaking of teenagers, for a hot second today I would have rather been dealing with the "I hate yous" of teenage angst than the tantrums of the terrible twos.   Grass is greener, I know.  I know.

Seriously?  Totally giving me the stink eye. 

It was a day and a half around this house and tonight finds me feeling defeated.  It's not the first time.  And I know, trust me, I know--- it isn't the last.  Whoever tries to make motherhood look all easy and we bake cookies all day and do educational Pinterest rainy day crafts until the cows come home is full of it.  It isn't easy and I have no shame in admitting it.

Do we have days like that?  The cookie baking crafty kind?  Sure.  But no day is perfect and lately all seem to be infused with mass amounts of toddler drama and crazies. 

For the love, I am a child development major.  I haven known about the terrible twos and all the shit that goes with them long before becoming a mother.  No amount of schooling or babysitting could have prepared me for being deep in the trenches with my own child.  Basically as a single mother.  When Paul is home?  What a difference.  She is so much more manageable and pleasant.  Like that doesn't make me feel like a terd.  Like it's all me.  Womp womp.

Don't get me wrong.  Elena is my best friend.  She is funny, loveable, affectionate, engaging, silly, smart...I am obsessed with her and miss her the second she falls asleep.  We have a million wonderful moments in a given day.  Moments where I stand in awe of this amazing creature God has blessed me with.  So many more wonderfully awesome moments than the ones that have me ranting tonight.

Sparkles and unicorns right there, people.  Makes it all worth it. 

But those ugly moments need to be documented, too.  Motherhood isn't all sparkles and unicorns.  It's slaps across the face from your kid in Trader Joe's because she doesn't want you to have your hands on the grocery cart.  It's that sassy "nope" when you ask her to do something routine.  It's that red face of embarrassment you get when your adorable spawn is the only one in gymnastics that wants no part of the parachute and lets everyone within a ten mile radius know it with her screams. All of it and then some.

But you know what?  I'll take it.  Tomorrow is a new day.  I'm hoping for sparkles and unicorns, but will navigate the tantrums and crazies, come as they will.  No doubt.