Starting solids

Ok, so if you'd asked me a few months ago, even a few weeks ago, about starting Elena on solids, I would've assured you we were skipping over purees, foregoing cereals, and would not be partaking in the shelling of peas or pureeing of meat.  Oh hell no.  I was all about Baby Led Weaning.  Bought the book, did my homework, preached to the naysayers.  Ha.  No.  Silly me.  I forgot I was a first time mom and that, as such, any proclamation or declaration of definitively doing something or not do something is pretty much ridiculous.  I have quickly learned that you can't simply decide what you want to do and do it.  Oh no.  An open mind and experimentation are necessities.

The fact is, I chickened out.  I was really excited to start solids.  Until the day came to start.  But, I stuck to the plan, hid my apprehension, and offered girlfriend some avocado. Not only was it was too slimy for her to grasp, but she really wasn't all that interested.  That in itself deflated what little hope and confidence I still had left.  Then came the gagging.  I thought I'd prepared myself for it, after reading about it and knowing the difference between gagging and choking.  But what the hell could prepare me to see my little sunshine girl wretching with tears streaming down her face as she tried to get what little of the avocado she got in her mouth to the back of her throat and down the pipe?!   Scared. Me. To. Death.  I maintained my composure though, so as not to freak her out, and quickly realized she was all smiles, and indeed the gagging was a natural reflex, helping her get the food to where it needed to be.  Duh.  I know all of this but it still freaked me out.

I did offer her some banana a few days later--also too slimy to grasp, and also caused her to gag.  It was then that I realized maybe this whole BLW thing wasn't for us.  Or for me, at least.  Maybe down the road when she seems more interested I'll experiment with table foods, but for now, I think we'll do just what I hadn't intended---Purees.  I don't feel defeated as I thought I might.  Instead, I feel excited.  Elena still isn't what I'd call interested in food.  She doesn't try to grab what I am eating and doesn't necessarily mimic our actions when we are chewing.  And though I'd be happy to continue exclusively breast feeding, I know it's time to start expanding her palette. 

So today, during a rare 2 1/2 hour nap I decided to attack the 3 lb bag of organic sweet potatoes I had from Trader Joe's.  I freaking love that store!!!! Thank goodness there is one right near where we are moving in Ohio! Behold, sweet potato puree...

Bake for 1 hour in 350 degree oven

Once cooled, peel skin off

Put in blender

Adding water (can use breast milk or formula) to get desired thickness, puree in blender

I forgot to snap a pic of the last step---I used a spatula to spread the puree evenly into 2 ice cube trays and covered them with plastic wrap.  Tomorrow morning I'll transfer the cubes to a dated Ziploc bag.  I believe they last 6 months in the freezer.  I'm looking forward to making all sorts of pureed veggies and fruit and coming up with tasty combinations for Elena to enjoy.  I'm thinking pears and squash are next!

Change

Holy crap. So much is going on and time needs to seriously slow the eff down.  Is my baby really turning 6 months old this weekend?  Did we really just put the house that we haven't even lived in a year on the market? Did it really SELL already?  Are we seriously up and moving to Ohio in less than 60 days without a confirmed place to live?  I am up to my ears in life changing events and I'm afraid to blink for fear of what I may miss.  Did I mention we bought a new (used) car on Saturday and that I am about to give my resignation from my teaching job that I've been at for 10 years.  Yeah, that too.

I can't even make sense of it at the moment to coherently express how I'm feeling.  Hopefully in the coming days I'll be able to wrap my brain around it all and recognize it for the blessing that it is.  I know all this change is affording me the ability to stay home and raise my baby girl.  For that I am truly grateful.  I get to spend my days playing with  this doll baby? Are you kidding me?  I'd move to the end of the Earth for that!

It's in the Bag

Ok I have to share.  I got a fabulous new diaper bag that I am in love with.  It was expensive, but my justification is that it doubles as my purse and I know it will get a ton of use.  I've always spent a decent amount on handbags because I use the heck out of them and well, I'll admit to being somewhat of a label whore when it comes to bags. 

I had originally gotten this great Marc Jacobs bag, which I loved....I had the matching purse and was certain the diaper bag was going to be equally as great.  I was wrong.  Elena wasn't even 3 months old before the shoulder strap was fraying and the stitching was coming undone.  Returned that bad boy and have been on the hunt for something big, black, and full of pockets.  I stumbled upon my new one in Nordstrom and so far I couldn't be happier.  I love money well spent! I can fit several cloth diapers, extra clothes, toys, a burp cloth, my wallet, and all the other stuff a new mom needs. 

hello loverrrrr

Baby's First Halloween...and snow?

Yes, you read that right.  Elena's first Halloween was a white one.   We got hit with a crazy snow storm that dropped about 4 inches of snow, remnants of which were still on the ground come time for trick-or-treating.  Several nearby towns postponed Halloween and several schools were closed for the entire week! It was a heavy, wet snow that caked on the leaves of the trees, causing limbs to snap like twigs, and entire trees to uproot.  Paul, Elena, and I hunkered down in the basement for most of the evening, even sleeping downstairs, because of the storm.  At one point, I'd gone upstairs to grab something and it sounded like I was court side at a Knicks game.   Branches were pelting the roof top.  We were lucky to maintain power, while most friends and family lost theirs.  G'ma and G'pa's neighborhood looked like a war zone the next morning...trees everywhere, wires down, yellow police tape.  I'll upload storm pics at a later date, but in meantime, how about some uber-cute pics of Elena's First Halloween...

Cupcake Baby

Trick-or-Treating with Daddy

Sleepy time

Ok, seriously? I know I'm biased but this is just ridiculously cute.  She was such a sport and kinda liked in there, I think. 

Rolls and Giggles

Elena is officially rolling over.  I'd be lying if I said I hadn't been waiting for her to do this for weeks. Now that it has, I have a twinge of sadness at how fast my girl is growing up.  She is clearly not a baby anymore. I mean, duh, she's a baby, but not a baby-baby.  She must have gotten quite a work out from Eleanor at PT yesterday. I'm thinking it greased up her baby parts nice and good because there was no slowing girlfriend's roll today. We were doing tummy time on the floor and she cocked her head back and the rest of her body followed.  She was supremely pleased with herself.  Paul and I were hooting and hollering and cheering like whack jobs.  Not sure how tummy time works now that she knows how to get out of it.  Hmm. 

In other firsts, she also hysterically giggled for the first time the other night when I was getting her ready for bed.   It is absoultely priceless.  I love how she gets pissed when I stop.  Unfortunately, I could only email a portion of the video, so it isn't the whole thing.  Certainly enough though.  Love this kid.

Hello? Is anybody out there?

I am a creeper.  A lurker.  A sit-in-the-back-and-wait-for-somebody-else-to-ask-the-question-I-want-to kind of girl.  I've been that way for most of my life, and although people who meet me would never guess I have social anxiety, it is real and I do. This is not a character trait I am proud of.  Certainly not one that I want to pass on to Elena as she blossoms into a young woman.  I want to teach her confidence.  I want her to be heard, to contribute, to express herself.  I want for her so many things that I worry I won't be able to teach her adequately because of my shortcomings-my anxieties.  I've realized that I need to work towards being a better version of myself so that I can be that example to her. 

So here I am today, coming out of hiding to share my voice.  So that maybe one day my little sunshine girl will know her mama as someone who had something to say and said it, even if no one wanted to listen.

I love reading blogs and there are a handful that I regularly keep up with. Today I've decided to officially follow them and be an active participant in the blogging world.  Now that I am a stay at home mom, preparing for a huge move to a place where I know NO ONE, I'm looking forward to blogging as a way to connect and share with people.  So, here goes this girl, out on a limb, ready to say whatever it is I want to say.  I'll start with thanks for stopping by :)

5 months!

Wednesday was Elena's 5 monthiversary. Here are two of my favorite shots from our photo shoot:

The fact that she is able to pretty much sit unassisted in her chair shows just how big she is getting.  Last month I kept having to prop her up so she wouldn't keel over.  Now, she's like, "Mom, I got this."  This was also her first time wearing her new baby legs. Girlfriend loves to be stylish.  And Mommy loves how they keep her little ham hocks legs warm. 

Not sure if she is teething, getting separation anxiety, or what, but we have had some serious sleepy time issues the past  4 nights.  Gone are the days of putting her down after I nurse her, drowsy but awake.  I thought sleep issues were supposed to get better in the 5th month, not worse! Tuesday night it took over 3 hours to get her down, and an hour and a half the following two nights.  Tonight wasn't so bad- she fell asleep nursing but woke up 2 times crying in the first hour of sleep.  I'm stumped.  I was hoping I could be one of the lucky ones to avoid any kind of sleep training. 

She is developing quite a personality.  My sunshine girl is always smiling.  Well, except for the night night escapades of late.  For real, though.  She smiles at everyone and everything.  It doesn't matter if you wear glasses, have a beard, or even if you have a deep voice.  If you smile at her, she smiles back.  It is pretty much the cutest thing ever.